Dear masked marauders and everyone else these days!

At the risk of sounding too over-the-top, there is one advantage of wearing masks (aside from… you know… preventing the spread of Cov-id). You can tell if your fresh and minty breath is actually fresh and minty. It works like this:

Mr. Quinn: I’m horny.

Jasmin: About time!

I hate that parrot! Thanks Simon Shim on Unsplash for thinking to take a picture of parrot brushing its beak. It’s like you read my mind.

Jasmin dons mask, breathes out with mouth, inhales through nose. Wishes she were the heroine in a romance novel, because those bitches never have bad breath. Goes to bathroom and brushes teeth.

Returns to living room to find Mr. Quinn naked except for the mask he’s wearing as an eye patch and the parrot on his shoulder.

Mr. Quinn: Let’s play walk the plank!

Jasmin (new game, same stupid parrot): Sure, but not with the parrot.

Mr. Quinn (stands with the cuffs): He’s my first mate, wench! Hands behind your back!

#creativewaystoisolate #parrots #masksarenotahardship #maskssavelives

If you look hard enough, you can always find the sunshine in the rain!

Jasmin Quinn, Totally Sober

I know what you’re thinking. Nice segue to the video, Jasmin. I do not get this video. Someone please explain it to me. Please!

Since I’m not getting out a lot, I’ve started a quest for sexy vegetables. I’m not eliminating fruit, but it’s sexy already. Ripe peaches, juicy watermelons, pear-shaped ass, popping the cherry, and of course, is that a banana in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

Thanks T. Q. on Unsplash, Dainis Graveris on Unsplash, Rebecca Matthews on Unsplash for having the foresight to take these pictures for my blog.

What started me on this quest? Mr. Facebook of course. He’s the best, isn’t he? I love it when that bastard makes the news for all the right reasons!

Click on the onions for the FB rejection that made onions across the world sexy, but no tweaking, pinching, sucking, squeezing or other inappropriate handling.

Thanks mayu ken on Unsplash for the walla wallas. Even the name sounds sexy.

So I dug around for some more sexy vegetables and turns out there are a bunch.

The pictures above are from: https://firstwefeast.com/eat/accidentally-sexual-fruits-vegetables – except for the parsnip. I don’t know where that came from.

The romantic in me loves this picture of carrot love. Click on the pic for the article about why vegetarians make better lovers. BTW: apparently most condoms aren’t vegan!


Before we move on to the very important news, I want share the discovery of 100 million year old sperm that was making headlines on September 17th. Seriously, every major news outlet carried the story.

Why? Because it’s about sperm, and not just old sperm, but also big sperm. And big sperm equals big balls which very likely equals a huge dick! At least that’s why I read the articles. All of them.

https://www.cnn.com/2020/09/17/world/sperm-oldest-amber-intl-scli-scn/index.html

Yes. It was chaos back then. Not like now.


On to the best news! House of Shadows has been released! Why is it such a big deal? Because it’s the 12th and final book the my Running with the Devil Series. I’m excited about the end, but having trouble letting go. That means that next year, I plan to publish two novellas.

Owen’s instant attraction to Mel, the woman he hires to investigate his father’s past, adds complications to his already tumultuous life. Mel’s past has left her scarred and vulnerable, and though she has all the skills she needs to fight the enemy of the day, she has no defense against her desire for Owen Scott.

To celebrate the end of this three year journey that was so fucking much fun, all my Running with the Devil books (Except House of Shadows) are on on sale on Amazon for a mere $0.99 each. This is a limited time deal, so grab them while they’re hot! https://www.amazon.com/Jasmin-Quinn/e/B078MYSC2M

More awesome news! If you’re not already signed up for my newsletter, get cracking! There are giveaways if you’re a subscriber including the chance to win 1 of 5 $10 Amazon gift cards. If I get 200 new sign-ups, one lucky subscriber will win an awesome gift basket!

Some of my books got a makeover last week, including Black Surrender, which has new title to go with it’s awesome new look! Isn’t it beautiful?

I did a little housecleaning with the all my books, updating back matter and a few bits and pieces. A couple of new covers and all my books are now available in paperback.


I have finally put my books into boxsets. Aren’t they pretty? Each collection has four books and Running with the Devil Books 9-12 will be available December 11, 2020. Amazon and I tussled over these and I’m embarrassed to admit, they broke me. It’s not often I beg, unless Mr. Quinn insists, but Mr. Amazon got me down on my knees. It worked though, because as of this posting they are all available (I hope).


What’s next for Jas, you wonder? Or maybe not, but I wonder. I’m kidding. I know what’s next.

First of all, I’ve gone wide. In the hips, yes, but also my books are now for sale on Amazon and Kobo, and soon, you’ll be able to buy them on Google, Apple, and Barnes & Noble. Unfortunately, going wide means I can no longer offer them for free in the Kindle Unlimited program.


Second, I’m putting together my publishing plan for 2021. Of course, I’ll be publishing a couple of Darkness Falls books. In February, Ulrich and Aubrey’s story gets told in Primal Heat. This book has been fun to write – I’m kind of in love with Ulrich. Primal Heat is available to preorder on Amazon and Kobo! And Leah finally gets her book sometime next summer. Is she really batshit crazy, or is there a vulnerable woman underneath that insane veneer? Stay tuned.

Finally, I’ve got a new series in the works that will be a whole lot of fun. Still romantic, steamy, spicy, plus blatantly humorous in a very biting way (I hope). That plus the two RWD novellas and at least two Darkness Falls books will keep me busy and out of trouble.

Oh yes, and my free book, Fearless, for my Newsletter is almost done. I had wanted it finished before House of Shadows was released, but it lost ground on my list of priorities. Everyone who subscribes to my newsletter will get a copy of this 65,000 word book.

I’m hoping I can finalize it before Christmas.


That’s all I got. Stay safe, friends and eat your vegetables.

Love and kisses,

Jasmin

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